At goal and holding now for 2 weeks

I think I have this down now.  I have hit my goal of 160 and have held it for 2 weeks which is more challenging that I thought it would be.  It is not that I want to eat bad foods but I find that I am still in losing mode and have found it hard to believe that I am in Maintenance mode now.

I have dropped 99 pounds in the past 8 months and have lost a total of 190pounds since my journey began.  I have started Yoga classes and have found a calling that is so strong that it makes my soul hurt at times but in a good way.

Heres to everyone on the path and hugs to all!

Stuck yet again....

I can tell that I am getting close to my healthy weight for me, I have been stuck at 167.2 for about 2 weeks and lose .4 then gain .4 the next day.  I am still striving to be down to 160 and at 5'7 and being large boned I am wondering how much longer my body will fight me on this?

Have a great week ahead everyone and for those in the weight loss battle, stay true!

On another path...

After stalling out with Dukan I have moved to a similar program called Ideal Protein and am now losing again, yay!

Today I feel

Smaller in body 

Stronger of heart

Hopeful

Impatient

A Longing

Ok, now to get this done...

I lost the 2 pounds I gained and now back on track for the final 15 pounds.  I have been stressed with getting the house ready for showings and trying to organize and balance all of the other life duties as well. 

I have been struggling with a cold/cough the past 3 weeks and it seems to have turned for the worse again with the stress so some hot herbal tea and some downtime are in order this weekend for sure.

I have been concentrating on higher protein levels and sticking with broccoli and asparagus for my veggies which are both good for fiber and asparagus is a natural diuretic so I am sure that helped to lose the 2 pounds gained.

I have cut out the oat bran muffins for now too and now to get off the last 15 pounds and be done with this.  85 pounds lost, wow it feels good to say that number.

Blew It....

With all that is going on in prepping the house for sale we went out to dinner and I planned on salmon but I ended up eating 3 cheese curds, 1/2 slice of texas toast, 2 onion rings and then about 2 T of Bleu Cheese on my Sirloin Steak.

I didn't go over too bad but I gained 2 pounds (mostly water of course from the salt) which is ok, I will lose it again over the next couple of days.

This is a lesson in maintenance and lose the little bit that you gain before it become 20+ pounds :-)

Stagnating Again...

Between getting a cold and my body readjusting from traveling across country for 2 weeks I seem to be stagnating so time to switch things up again:  Here is my menu for the day:


Breakfast
2 OB muffins
1 hard boiled egg

Lunch
Veggie Salad with Tuna
1 Yogurt

Dinner
Salmon
Broccoli

2 week vacation and a good loss to boot :-)

We have been away the past 2 weeks on a working vacation which took us from Minnesota to the Oregon Coast and Seattle.  We traveled by car which allowed us plenty of hours to do some database maintenace and internal improvements on the site which went very well and things should be running a bit faster for everyone and less issues with downloads.

I managed to lose 5 pounds during the 2 week period and had a couple of maintenance days which was very nice as far as a change of pace.  I didn't do anything extravagant and stayed away from sugar and processed food as usual but did treat myself to Sushi one night and a baked potato another nite and one dinner roll with no butter.

I have changed my goal weight from 170 to 160 and just 19 more pounds to go :-)

Dukan Day 102

188.2!  18 pounds away from my goal of 170 and I am so thrilled!!!!

Dukan Day 97

189.8!  I was hoping to be in the 180's by mid August and here I am not even to the end of July.  I am so thrilled with the progress and even more so the way I feel, energetic, confident and full of pride :-)

7/1 202 P/P
7/2 200.6 P/V
7/3 200.4 P/P
7/4 199.6 P/V
7/5 197.8 P/P
7/6 197.8 P/V
7/7 198.8 P/P
7/8 198.2 P/V
7/9 198 P/P
7/10 197.8 P/P
7/11 197.4 P/V
7/12 197.2 P/P
7/13 196.8 P/V
7/14 195 P/P
7/15 194.6 P/V
7/16 194 P/P
7/17 193.8 P/V
7/18 193.2 P/P
7/19 193 P/V
7/20 192.8 P/P
7/21 192.4 P/V
7/22 192.2 P/P
7/23 191.8 P/V
7/24 191.4 P/P
7/25 191.2 P/V TTOM too!
7/26 190.8 P/P
7/27/190.2 P/V
7/28 189.8 P/P

Dukan Day 94

7/1 202 P/P
7/2 200.6 P/V
7/3 200.4 P/P
7/4 199.6 P/V
7/5 197.8 P/P
7/6 197.8 P/V
7/7 198.8 P/P
7/8 198.2 P/V
7/9 198 P/P
7/10 197.8 P/P
7/11 197.4 P/V
7/12 197.2 P/P
7/13 196.8 P/V
7/14 195 P/P
7/15 194.6 P/V
7/16 194 P/P
7/17 193.8 P/V
7/18 193.2 P/P
7/19 193 P/V
7/20 192.8 P/P
7/21 192.4 P/V
7/22 192.2 P/P
7/23 191.8 P/V
7/24 191.4 P/P
7/25 191.2 P/V TTOM too!



21 pounds to go and it is hard to believe but I am almost there.  I have been thinking about consolidation now and strategizing that process and reading reading reading the Dukan book.  I am nervous and excited at the same time :-)

Here is a pic of me at my heaviest in 2002 ;-(

Dukan Day 89

Sorry the lag in posts folks, I have been so busy I can hardly see straight.  I am continuing to lose well and now down to 193.8 and working hard toward that next goal of 180 and then my plan is to maintain for 3 months and give my body a rest.  I feel confident entering this stage and looking forward to being at the end of this journey, but there never really is and end is there, rather it is just the journey.

I celebrated my Birthday on the 17th and didn't have any cake, which was not hard at all.  The thought of sugar turns my stomach and I think it would actually make me ill at this point, good thing!

My menu for today

2 Dukan OB muffins
Egg White Omelet with Mushrooms
Cottage Cheese
Chicken Breast
Tenderloin Steak
Salad with lettuce, broccoli, radishes and green peppers

Dukan Day 85

7/1 202 P/P
7/2 200.6 P/V
7/3 200.4 P/P
7/4 199.6 P/V
7/5 197.8 P/P
7/6 197.8 P/V
7/7 198.8 P/P
7/8 198.2 P/V
7/9 198 P/P
7/10 197.8 P/P
7/11 197.4 P/V
7/12 197.2 P/P
7/13 196.8 P/V
7/14 195 P/P
7/15 194.6 P/V

Going good!  Under 195 now and could not be more pleased!  I have a recipe for you that is interesting and fun :-)

Kale Chips

Seperate Kale leaf from stalk, tear into bite size peices
Line a cookie sheet with foil and then lightly spray each leaf with Pam Olive Oil
Sprinkle Sea Salt on all of the leaves
Bake at 350 for about 10 minutes or until crispy and enjoy :-)

Dukan Day 83

One more pound until I hit 195 :-)

Dukan Day 82

7/1 202 P/P
7/2 200.6 P/V
7/3 200.4 P/P
7/4 199.6 P/V
7/5 197.8 P/P
7/6 197.8 P/V
7/7 198.8 P/P
7/8 198.2 P/V
7/9 198 P/P
7/10 197.8 P/P
7/11 197.4 P/V
7/12 197.2 P/P

Continuing to inch down and seeing a good loss rate - yay!  I have been so busy that I can hardly see straight and there have been 2 days where I hardly ate anything at all and not a good thing, it was everything I could do to not attack the Cheddar Cheese popcorn.  This is a good example that you HAVE to eat your meals, very important.

Today's Menu

Egg White Omelet
2 Dukan OB Muffins
Shrimp
Cottage Cheese
Chicken Breast
Salmon

Dukan Day 77

7/1 202 P/P
7/2 200.6 P/V
7/3 200.4 P/P
7/4 199.6 P/V
7/5 197.8 P/P
7/6 197.8 P/V
7/7 198.8 P/P

well, I am up a pound and not really sure why?  Yesterday was a P/V day but that usually does not affect me so not really sure why but we shall see if it is gone tomorrow.  I think the last 50 pounds is going to be a little harder to get off :-(

I did spend some time out in the sun yesterday and it could be water retention from the heat as well as I do feel a bit more "fluffy" this morning....

Menu from Yesterday

Breakfast
2egg white omelette with mushroom
2 Dukan OB Muffins

Lunch
Chicken Breast
Salad with cucumber, peppers and lettuce

Snack
1 tub of yogurt

Dinner
Salmon Filet
Green Beans

Dukan Day 75

7/1 202 P/P
7/2 200.6 P/V
7/3 200.4 P/P
7/4 199.6 P/V
7/5 197.8 P/P

I made it to "one"derland!!!!  197 - I am over the moon and absolutely thrilled!  My next goal is 190 and ultimately I will get to 150.

I found I had to mix up my foods again to get out of the stagnation and I seem to have to do this about once a month to keep my body fooled and continue losing.

I hope everyone had a great Holiday :-)

Dukan Day 71

Still fighting TOTM and still at 200 but have 2 more days left so hopefully next week will be a loss to see the 190's.

We don't have much planned this weekend other than some riding time.  I spent most of the morning this morning with the farrier having two of our horses feet done, they look so nice when they are freshly trimmed :-)

Menu for today:

Breakfast
2 Dukan OB Muffins

Snack
1 tub of Vanilla Yogurt
Sliced Turkey

Lunch
Chicken Breast
Cottage Cheese

Dinner
Salmon
Shrimp and a bit of steak

Dukan Day 67

Well, still not to the 100's TOTM started but soon so very soon, currently sitting smack dab on 200 :-)  Here is my Monday morning photo showing my progress.  No loss but I can see reduction in my face :-)

Dukan Day 64

6/1 213.4 P/P
6/2 211.2 P/V
6/3 209 P/P
6/4 208 P/V
6/5 209 P/P
6/6 210 P/V
6/7 209 P/P
6/8 207 P/V
6/9 206 P/P
6/10 205.6 P/V
6/11 205.4 P/P
6/12 204.6 P/V
6/13 204.4 P/P
6/14 203.8 P/V
6/15 202.4 P/P
6/16 202.6 P/V
6/17 202.0 P/P
6/18 201.8 P/V
6/19 201.4 P/P
6/20 201.0 P/V
6/21 201.0 P/P
6/22 203.0 P/V
6/23 201.8 P/P
6/24 201.4 P/V

So close :-)  Here is yesterday's menu:

Breakfast
2 Dukan Muffins
2 Egg White Omelette

Lunch
1 Chicken Breast
3 oz of left over Steak
1 tub of Yogurt

Snack
1 c Cottage Cheese

Dinner
Ground Turkey Soup (Yesterday was a P/P day but I did veggies anyway)
Recipe:
2 lb of Lean ground turkey
1 C of Chopped Carrots
1 C of Celery
1/3 c of minced onion
1 C of oven roasted Red Pepper
Handful of Mushrooms
Garlic to taste
Pepper to taste
2 large containers of low sodium Chicken Broth (60mg per 8 oz)

My girls who are 9 and 11 absolutely loved it and asked for seconds :-)

Dukan Day 63

This has worked out pretty well, after gaining 2 pounds I am now 1.8 pounds away from being in the 100's

6/1 213.4 P/P
6/2 211.2 P/V
6/3 209 P/P
6/4 208 P/V
6/5 209 P/P
6/6 210 P/V
6/7 209 P/P
6/8 207 P/V
6/9 206 P/P
6/10 205.6 P/V
6/11 205.4 P/P
6/12 204.6 P/V
6/13 204.4 P/P
6/14 203.8 P/V
6/15 202.4 P/P
6/16 202.6 P/V
6/17 202.0 P/P
6/18 201.8 P/V
6/19 201.4 P/P
6/20 201.0 P/V
6/21 201.0 P/P
6/22 203.0 P/V
6/23 201.8 P/P

Menu for yesterday:
Breakfast
2 Dukan Muffins
2 Egg White Omelette with green peppers and mushrooms
Lunch
Chicken Salad with lettuce, radishes, garden zuccchini, cucumber and Dukan dressing
1 tub of Yogurt
Snack
2 slices of roasted turkey wrapped in lettuce leaves with 1T of onion and green peppers
Dinner
1 5oz New York Strip with steamed broccoli
1 c of Cottage Cheese

Dukan Day 62

I made some realizations yesterday that I wanted to share. It was my Grandson's Birthday yesterday and he turned 5 so we went to our local Chinese Restaurant to celebrate. I knew that I wasn't going to stay on track and I had 8 pieces of Sushi and grilled chicken and beef (no oils or sauces) from the Hibachi. I could have just stuck with the hibachi and stayed on plan but I wanted sushi and walked in with my goals in place and I didn't deviate. I had no cake and actually it didn't even sound good

I gained 2 lbs this morning (salt from the soy sauce and the carbs from the rice) and you know what I am totally fine with it! I am learning skills valuable for Stabilization and I am proud that I stayed away from the hot bar where all the fat laden foods are and stuck with my goals of just sushi and hibachi.

3 months ago I would have beat myself up and I would have whined and moaned that I shouldn't have done it but I am now realizing that we are all human and it is actually good for us to learn that we can eat a little beyond (key is not go crazy) what we should every once in a while and most importantly not to beat ourselves up over it. The key is not to do this often and treat as just a treat that is to be enjoyed and not abused. Eat to Live, not Live to Eat.

I still may see the 190's by Friday and if not I know that I will see it very soon....

Dukan Day 61

Well I stayed the same today but I am still hoping to see the 100's by the end of the week.  My menu today will be a tad switched up and here is the menu:

2 Dukan Muffins
1 Top Sirloin Steak
1 cup Cottage Cheese
1 Vanilla Yogurt
Shrimp
2 Hard Boiled Eggs

Let's see what tomorrow brings :-)

Dukan Day 60

Getting ever so close, I should see "one"derland by Wednesday:_)




6/1 213.4 P/P
6/2 211.2 P/V
6/3 209 P/P
6/4 208 P/V
6/5 209 P/P
6/6 210 P/V
6/7 209 P/P
6/8 207 P/V
6/9 206 P/P
6/10 205.6 P/V
6/11 205.4 P/P
6/12 204.6 P/V
6/13 204.4 P/P
6/14 203.8 P/V
6/15 202.4 P/P
6/16 202.6  P/V
6/17 202.0 P/P
6/18 201.8 P/V
6/19 201.4 P/P
6/20 201.0 P/V

Dukan Day 56

Well, I am up .02 of a pound and I have been under quite a bit of stress the past 2 days so I think that this is playing into it.  Things should start to settle today though so hopefully I see that "one"derland soon :-)

6/1 213.4 P/P
6/2 211.2 P/V
6/3 209 P/P
6/4 208 P/V
6/5 209 P/P
6/6 210 P/V
6/7 209 P/P
6/8 207 P/V
6/9 206 P/P
6/10 205.6 P/V
6/11 205.4 P/P
6/12 204.6 P/V
6/13 204.4 P/P
6/14 203.8 P/V
6/15 202.4 P/P
6/16 202.6  P/V

Dukan Day 53

6/1 213.4 P/P
6/2 211.2 P/V
6/3 209 P/P
6/4 208 P/V
6/5 209 P/P
6/6 210 P/V
6/7 209 P/P
6/8 207 P/V
6/9 206 P/P
6/10 204 P/V
6/11 204 P/P
6/12 203 P/V
6/13 202 P/P

Yay I am almost to "one"derland!  I am so pleased!  For those that are interested in a Dukan Bulletin Board check this out:   http://www.dukaners.com/

Dukan Day 50

6/1 213.4 P/P
6/2 211.2 P/V
6/3 209 P/P
6/4 208 P/V
6/5 209 P/P
6/6 210 P/V
6/7 209 P/P
6/8 207 P/V
6/9 206 P/P
6/10 204 P/V

This has been a really good month so far and I am 4 pounds away from "one"derland!  Yay!  I am just amazed with the success of this diet and strongly encourage other to try it if they are looking to lose some weight.

Dukan Day 49

well, I have started losing again and now down 36 pounds!  It seems that this diet is a fine balance with my body if I eat the same thing for too long my body just stops losing.  I switched things up by increasing higher quality protein such as steak and more lean meats and voila here we go again.




Menu for yesterday:
Cottage Cheese
1 Dukan Muffin
Vanilla Yogurt
1 Hard Boiled Egg
1 Chicken Breast
Seared Sirloin Steak and Chicken Breast
1 F/F S/F Jello

Dukan Day 46

I am up 4 lbs and have no idea why?  I have been eating as I normally do and all of the sudden I am gaining 1 pound a day.  I am so very frustrated!

Dukan Day 43

Still stuck at the scales and no movement but I am hanging in there.  We took the girls out for dinner last night to celebrate their last day of school and the both of them bringing home A's and B's.  I stayed true and had a dry salad and 3oz of Beef Brisket and ONE french fry.

I have a lot of outside work that needs to be done which is laborious and the exercise should be enough to get the scales to move downward :-)  Have a great weekend everyone!

Dukan Day 41

Well, the start of June means a new spreadsheet:

6/1 213.4 P/P Up 4 pounds due to TOM but down .04 as of this morning

It will likely take me a week to get the numbers back down and it is frustrating but what can one do?

Breakfast
2 hard boiled eggs
3 slices of turkey breast

Snack
Cottage Cheese

Lunch
Salmon Salad with Dukan Dressing

Snack
3 slices of turkey breast

Dinner
Vegetable beef Soup - yum!

Dukan Day 40

Well, the TOM weight showed up and I have gained almost 4 pounds, not coming off yet but I sure am trying :-(

I stayed on track all weekend with the exception of 4 pieces of dried pineapple but no adverse effects, back on track now though.

Made Half Way To Goal Today!

Lost another pound and that puts me half way to goal, I am so pleased!

Dukan Day 34

Well, so much for pre-TOM losing, disappointed but I know it is temporary....  Here are two pictures taken 2 weeks apart and I can see a difference so I am going to hang on to that for now :-)

Dukan Day 33

Yesterday was super busy with work stuff, kid stuff, horse stuff and the occasional drama thrown in just for good measure, as if I wasn't on my toes enough.  Stayed on track as always and I am finding that I don't even think about what I can't have anymore but rather look forward to creating my menu for the day and challenging my creativity.

Down another .02 from yesterday and since TOM is right around the corner, so very glad to still see a loss.  I have to wonder because by now I would have gained about 2 pounds so this should be very interesting.

Dukan Day 32

5/1 221 P/V
5/2 220.4 P/P
5/3 220 P/V
5/4 219.8 P/P
5/5 217.4 P/V
5/6 217.2 P/P
5/7 216.8 P/V
5/8 217.8 - Blew it last night!
5/9/218.7 - Residual water weight P/P
5/10 217.8 Losing again P/P
5/11 217.6 P/P
5/12 218.4 P/V
5/13 217.4 P/P
5/14 216.6 P/V
5/15 215.2 P/P
5/16 214.4 P/V
5/17 213.8 P/P
5/18 212.6 P/V
5/19 211.8 P/P
5/20 210.6 P/V
5/21 210.4 P/P
5/22 210.2 P/V
5/23 209.2 P/P

Yes!  I broke my second goal of 210 and am now below that!  That is 12 pounds so far this month and considering TOM is just 3 days away, I am very happy with my loss the past several days!

Dukan Day 29

One month comparison pic - the right is 1 month ago and the left taken today, represents 22 lbs loss.

5/1 221 P/V
5/2 220.4 P/P
5/3 220 P/V
5/4 219.8 P/P
5/5 217.4 P/V
5/6 217.2 P/P
5/7 216.8 P/V
5/8 217.8 - Blew it last night!
5/9/218.7 - Residual water weight P/P
5/10 217.8 Losing again P/P
5/11 217.6 P/P
5/12 218.4 P/V
5/13 217.4 P/P
5/14 216.6 P/V
5/15 215.2 P/P
5/16 214.4 P/V
5/17 213.8 P/P
5/18 212.6 P/V
5/19 211.8 P/P
5/20 210.6 P/V

Down another .08 and thrilled!  I did a fair amount of walking with Harmony on her horse yesterday and the losses show how important exercise is :-)

Menu for yesterday:

Breakfast
2 Dukan OB Muffins
1/2 c Cottage Cheese

Snack
1 S/F Jello

Lunch
1 Yogurt
1 slice of oven roasted turkey
Home smoked Salmon

Dinner
Diced Turkey in salad with Dukan Dressing

Dukan Day 28

Another good day and lost .08 of a pound, here are my stats so far (I started at 252 on a previous diet) and my total loss to date is 41 pounds - yippee!

5/1 221 P/V
5/2 220.4 P/P
5/3 220 P/V
5/4 219.8 P/P
5/5 217.4 P/V
5/6 217.2 P/P
5/7 216.8 P/V
5/8 217.8 - Blew it last night!
5/9/218.7 - Residual water weight P/P
5/10 217.8 Losing again P/P
5/11 217.6 P/P
5/12 218.4 P/V
5/13 217.4 P/P
5/14 216.6 P/V
5/15 215.2 P/P
5/16 214.4 P/V
5/17 213.8 P/P
5/18 212.6 P/V
5/19 211.8 P/P

Yesterday's menu:

Breakfast
2 Dukan OB Muffins
2 Rounds of 95% F/F Canadian Bacon

Snack
1 Yogurt

Lunch
Chicken Breast
1/2 C Cottage Cheese

Snack
1 S/F Jello

Dinner
Shrimp
Salad with Dukan Dressing

Dukan Day 27

Well, it was quite an adventure yesterday, we took the horses to an Equine Park for some trail riding and rode with our trainer who is working with our Filly and she has been under saddle now for 2 weeks.

The ride was fine for about half way and then all of the sudden my filly exploded and threw a bucking fit and tossed the trainer flat on his back.  It was very scary to watch, she was a bucking bronco big time, we are not sure what set her off, if it was the readjustment of the saddle right before or perhaps she could have even been stung by a wasp.

I was riding my Daughters horse which is a very small horse and he started to get very jumpy and wouldn't listen and went into a trot to get out of there and back to the trailer.  I  had to get off and we all walked the remaining 1 mile.  This was horse terrain and lots of gravel hills, bogs and difficult terrain.  I was exhausted by the time we got back and I knew that I would show a good loss on the scale this morning and I did, down 1.8 pounds.  I think I need to do this kind of exercise to keep a good loss going, I have to admit that I hate exercise and the only real exercise I get is from gardening and horse back riding.  This was good for me and what a revelation.  I am sure sore today though.....

Menu for yesterday:

Breakfast
2 Dukan OB Muffins
2 Egg White Omelette

Lunch
F/F S/F Yogurt
1/2 Chicken Breast

Snack
F/F S/F Yogurt
1/2 C Cottage Cheese

Dinner
Good sized piece of Salmon

Dukan Day 25

Another Monday and feeling very good.  I am up .04 of a pound but yesterday was a P/V day and that is to be expected.  I took my measurements yesterday and compared to 25 days ago and WOW what a motivation that was, so cool to see the loss in inches too.

Menu for  the day:

Breakfast
2 Dukan OB Muffins (made with banana flavoring yum)
2 Egg White Omelette

Snack
1 6oz tub of F/F S/F Yogurt

Lunch
1 Chicken Breast
1/2 c 1% Cottage Cheese

Snack
1 S/F Jello

Dinner
Shrimp with crushed garlic
1/2 C F/F S/F Yogurt

Dukan Day 24

Down another 2 lbs over the weekend and thrilled!  Looks like changing some of the food intake did the job - gotta remember to keep things mixed up :-)

Dukan Day 21

5/1 221 P/V
5/2 220.4 P/P
5/3 220 P/V
5/4 219.8 P/P
5/5 217.4 P/V
5/6 217.2 P/P
5/7 216.8 P/V
5/8 217.8 - Blew it last night!
5/9/218.7 - Residual water weight P/P
5/10 217.8 Losing again P/P
5/11 217.6 P/P
5/12 218.4 P/V

Well I gained .08 of a pound and not sure why other than working out in the humidity last night planting seedlings so it could be water weight.  I tend to retain water in heat very easily so we shall so if it goes with tomorrow's weigh in.

I have been finding that I am getting pretty bored with what I am eating so I am going to mix it up a bit today and see if that helps with the stagnation too.  Being 47 I am finding it harder and harder to lose weight and the stagnation periods are much more frequent compared to other diet episodes.

Last night I had a nice large salad with a Dukan Dressing recipe and chicken.  Here is the recipe for the dressing.

2 large tubs F/F S/F Vanilla or Plain Yogurt
2T of Balsamic Vinegar
2T or to taste of crushed Garlic
2T of Stone Ground Mustard

Mix together and it makes a lovely dressing.  The vanilla yogurt gives it a bit of a sweeter flavor and if you go with the plain you can add dill and other spices for a more savory dressing.

Dukan Day 19

5/1 221 P/V
5/2 220.4 P/P
5/3 220 P/V
5/4 219.8 P/P
5/5 217.4 P/V
5/6 217.2 P/P
5/7 216.8 P/V
5/8 217.8 - Blew it last night!
5/9/218.7 - Residual water weight P/P
5/10 217.8 Losing again P/P

Had a bad day Saturday and was caught out too late and stopped for dinner starving - not a good idea.  I had planned on Salmon but ended up with a Blue Cheese Hamburger, Fries and a Margarita.

Back on track now though and losing.... I didn't eat much yesterday and had only 2 eggs, 4 slices of turkey and 2 OB Dukan muffins.

Dukan Day 15

5/1 221 P/V
5/2 220.4 P/P
5/3 220 P/V
5/4 219.8 P/P
5/5 217.4 P/V
5/6 217.2 P/P

Not feeling very well today and I have no idea why?  It started in the afternoon with being REALLY tired and had to literally drag myself around the grocery store yesterday, I had zero energy. I woke up this morning to being light headed and just no energy.  My work days have been full as usual and nothing really has changed there.  I have to pick up the girls this afternoon and run Harmony to a sleepover birthday party this afternoon too and I really need to work horses too, now to just find the energy.

I wanted to climb into bed at 7pm last night and this is really odd.  I posted on the Dukaners.com forum and some are suggesting low blood pressure but I have no way to check it and see where I am at.  I have always had normal BP so this might be a possibility but I am not going to make an appt at the Dr. which is 115.00 just to check my BP.

I am hoping that this resolves by tomorrow and I am definitely eating enough too:

Breakfast:
2 Dukan OB Muffins
3 Egg White Omelette with Canadian Bacon (95% fat free) and mushrooms

Lunch:
Cottage Cheese - about 1 cup
Sliced Deli Meat - about 6 slices
Radishes - 5
Grilled Asparagus 10

Dinner:
Vegetable/Ground Turkey soup with Onions, Mushroom, Zucchini and low salt (125 MG per 1 cup) Broth, I had about 3 cups of this.

Snack:
1 S/F Jello

I drank 2 liters of fluid which was mostly water followed by 2 cups of coffee and 2 glasses of Crystal Light

Dukan Day 14

5/1 221 P/V
5/2 220.4 P/P
5/3 220 P/V
5/4 219.8 P/P
5/5 217.4 P/V

WOW!!!!  I am down 2.4 this morning and absolutely thrilled.  I ate a little more protein yesterday and had an additional yogurt to try and get the scale to budge a little more and it worked.  Yesterday was a P/P day too so I will likely not see as much of  a loss tomorrow being a P/V day.

I am noticing several things since starting this and I am feeling a wonderful sense of well being, being at peace, clothes are MUCH looser, thinking is clearer and best of all I experience very few cravings now.

I am feeling absolutely fabulous!

Dukan Day 13

Still doing very well and here is a quick synopsis of my loss for this week:

5/1 221 P/V
5/2 220.4 P/P
5/3 220 P/V
5/4 219.8 P/P

Things are slowing down a bit but I am at least seeing a loss each morning at weigh in.  The Cruise phase for me has been alternating days of just protein and then protein/veggies and the veggies are what is causing the weight to slow down due to water weight gain which is also reflected in the numbers.

Still hanging in there and I am feeling really good as well and have a good sense of well being with continues daily despite my many stress factors :-)

Dukan Day 11

Another good weekend!  We went to the movies (Water for Elephants) and I made sure that I was armed with sugarless gum while everyone in the family munched on miscellaneous treats.  I wanted some at first but then the craving subsided pretty quickly :-)

I am down another .08 of a pound over the weekend and very pleased with the steady loss.  The only deviation that I had was a handful of nuts last night and I ate 12 almonds which is not really on the Dukan Diet but something that I my body was craving but no hurt, still lost .02 since yesterday :-)

I have been noticing a sense of well being that is very familiar from when I followed a whole food program when I lost the 170 pounds and I had forgotten how much I missed that feeling.

Dukan Day 8

Wow!!!  I dropped my TOM weight (4.2 pounds) and I am only 2 days in, so that means I am losing very well!  I am absolutely over the top...

I did get in 1 hour of horseback riding too so that may have helped push a little weight off.  I am so pleased!

Dukan Day 7

Yuck!  I gained 1.4 pounds after starting the Cruise phase yesterday and I know that it is to be expected but still hard to see on the scale.  It is also TOM too so I suspect that I gained 5 from that as I usually so I am actually down but it is just being camouflaged right now :-(

I went ahead and signed up for the Dukan coaching too which I am rather excited about and will start that tomorrow, I filled in the questionnaire this morning.  The only issue is that I have already completed the Attack Phase and they have me starting that so I guess I can go back?  Liz, any thoughts on that?

Menu for the day:

Breakfast
Oat Bran Porridge with 2T of Oat Bran, 1/2 t of Splenda and some Vanilla
2 Hard Boiled Eggs

Lunch
4 oz of sliced turkey breast
4 oz of sliced deli roast beef
3 cups of salad
3T of Balsamic vinegar

Dinner
3 cups of steamed Broccoli
6 oz of steamed Salmon

I am actually looking forward to the Salmon tonight.

Dukan Day 6

Today is the last day of the Attack Phase (Phase 1) and I have lost 8 pounds.  I will start gaining water weight though tomorrow (read between the lines here without me saying why).  tomorrow I start the Cruise Phase and will be doing the 1/1 method which is one day of just protein and then the next day protein and veggies and alternating thereafter.

Menu for the day:

Breakfast:
1 egg white omelette (Egg Beaters) with 3 slices of Canadian Bacon
2 Dukan Oat Bran Muffins

Lunch:
4 slices of deli roast beef
4 slices of deli turkey
3T of non fat cream cheese with varied spices as a spread

Dinner:
6oz of Wild Salmon with fat free yogurt dill sauce

I am feeling an amazing amount of energy today and feel absolutely wonderful!






My Weight Chart:

Dukan Day 5

After getting through not feeling very well Sunday and feeling rather lethargic yesterday despite some good ol sunshine, I am feeling better today.  Feeling lots of energy this morning and also rewarded with a .8 pound loss from yesterday.

Today marks day 5 and 2 more days of the pure protein and then onto the Cruise Phase which is incorporating veggies to my menu, I miss my veggies.  I have lost 6.8 pounds in 5 days and have broken the barrier of the plateau.  I have now lost a total of 28.8 pounds.

Yesterday's menu consisted of:

Breakfast
Veggie Burger
2 Oat Bran Muffins

Lunch
1 hard boiled egg
3 slices of turkey breast
1 nonfat vanilla yogurt

Dinner
4 oz of turkey meat balls (I purchased the Jennie-O brand and had to force them down as I used to work there and despised it!)

I have not been hungry in the least and been making sure to drink 1.5 liters of water and I have not one hunger pang and after 4 days of craving carbs that is now gone too.  5 days with no sugar and no processed food of any sort.  Yay me!

The girls have been asking for Jimmy John's (sub shop in the US) and I complied and stopped there last night.  They opened the window of the drive through and I was hit with the most delicious aroma and it was Heaven, and that was enough.  I never even craved what everyone was eating as I worked on my turkey meatballs.  Amazing!

Dukan

Since there are only a handful of people that read this blog I am going to apologize now as I will be reporting on my success with the Dukan diet and that will be the focus for a bit.

Here we go:

As of February 2011 I had embarked on the Weight Watchers plan to try and drop the last of this weight that I gained since the tornado.  A bit of history first though, I used to weigh 320 pounds and successfully got down to 170 pounds as of 2007, then the tornado in 2008 and I gained 80 pounds back from being forced to live in a hotel and having to eat out for all meals.  Looking back it was just an excuse, I could have made better choices but I was an emotional wreck and it wasn't going to happen.

I just allowed it to sit there and then in March I was ready to get healthy again, as I said, I joined Weight Watchers and lost 18.5 pounds and as of April 12th I was stuck, no loss at all and I knew immediately what was going on.  Too many carbs, my body hangs on to any extra weight if I go above 50% carbs in my daily intake which is what was recommended.

I lost the weight previously by following my own plan which consisted of only whole foods and nothing that came out of a box or a bag, including salad.  I began to track my Weight Watchers consumption and found that I was leaning on processed foods and my body just said "nope, not gonna work it this way".  So I stayed stuck for 3 weeks.....  Becoming more and more frustrated.

My practical side then took over and the scientist and developer in me did some analysis and my typical diet consisted of the following:

Breakfast
1 Weight Watchers yogurt
1 slice of Whole Wheat Bread
1 Egg

Lunch
1/2 cup cottage cheese
12 almonds
3 slices of turkey breast
1 pouch Weight Watchers Multigrain Crackers

Dinner
Generally a Weight Watchers meal of some sort, I wasn't ready to go back to whole foods apparently, it is a rather tough thing to do.  Alot of processed foods here which means alot of sodium and a lot of carbs.

I then discoverd the Dukan diet which prescribed to pretty much the way I ate when I lost over 170 pounds.

I did some research and bought the book and have lost 5 pounds in 5 days.  My typical diet in the first phase (The Attack Phase) is:

Breakfast
Hot Oat Bran Porridge - 3T oat bran, 1/3 c skim milk and dash of Splenda
1 non fat yogurt
1 Hard Boiled Egg

Lunch
Homemade Oat Bran Muffin (3 eggs, 9T Oat Bran, 9T non fat yogurt, 3t Baking soda, 3t vanilla extract)
3 Slices Turkey Breast

Dinner
4oz of fish (generally, Halibut, Shrimp, Salmon)
1 C Cottage Cheese

I will be continuing the Attack Phase for another 5 pounds and then onto the Cruise Phase.  I will be reporting here my finding and feelings during my journey to lose the last remaining 60 pounds.

As of day 4 I am feeling really good although I didn't feel so well yesterday and I recognized it as detox so rested most of the day preserving my energy and I am feeling really good this morning.  This phase is very hard for those that consume a lot of sugar or processed foods but I found it very easy and very familiar and began to recognize changes in my body that were for the positive.


Enjoy the journey...

Wind

I have always adored the gentle breezes of the ocean and the breezes that come with the Spring and the beautiful pink sky sunrise that greets us during the Spring months.  I have started doing some more jewelry and I was inspired by yesterday's sunrise to assemble this beautiful bracelet.

It is comprise of AAA Rhodochrosite beads and oxidized chain with bright silver wire work for contrast.  You can find more details here

It's back....

After a good melting that has cleared 90% of the snow but also has flooded the stalls, we had hopes that Winter was behind us.  But no.....

Last night we started with fierce downfalls of rain, thunder and hail that turned to slushy snow that turned to pure snow and we ended up with another 4 inches to cover what was uncovered once again.....  No school today and 2 very bored little girls with parents that have to work besides the tumultous weather.

Oh well, someday it will warm up and I will rejoice when that day comes.

Today

Today's Sunrise 

"May today there be peace within. May you trust that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith in yourself and others. May you use the gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content with yourself just the way you are. Let this knowledge settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us."

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

The Good

I have 10.8 pounds since following Weight Watchers 2 weeks ago.  I feel good and have been making good progress.

The Bad

I have 60 more to go thanks to the tornado that displaced us in a hotel for almost 4 months with only restaurant food to choose from.

The Ugly

It is 10 degrees out there and poor Eva was even covered in frost, in her stall to boot which is usually 10 degrees warmer from the other 4 stalled horses!

Winds Through The Boughs

I am often touched by the delicacy of life in mid winter.  Outside our office windows we have a beautiful silver needle pine tree and at this time of year the birds are starting to return and the small swallows have been finding refuge under the bows of that said tree.  As I watch I see them land and the wind then sends them fluttering off to the neighboring fields only for them to return and try again.

Spring is right around the corner and it could not be soon enough.  Someday they will return here:

For the Love of Words

Brontide

Cacchination

Dompteuse

Inaniloquent

Pandiculation

Wanweird

Your mission is to look up these words and learn the meanings, it is always good to learn something new.

Good News

After taking my mare Tess to the barn with an indoor arena and my trainer riding her for the first time, I have been told "you are crazy for selling her, she is the best horse I have ever ridden".

Lot's of discussion later I have decided to keep her, she really is a fabulous horse and for him to rave about her as he did I need to listen.  This man has over 40 years of experience and to say that "she is the best horse I have ridden" speaks volumes about this sweet girl so I rode her and agreed once again and back on the trailer to home she went :-)

On that note, I have decided to sell her Daughter which is a carbon copy of her in all ways but just not started her under saddle yet.  I have ground driven her, bitted her, thrown a saddle on her and now to just finish her and get her sold. Here is a picture and she looks just like Mom.  I just need to reduce the number of horses we have, 7 is too many.

She will make someone a fabulous horse!

Another Busy Week

It has been crazy busy and I apologize for the gap in posts.  We have been dealing with more snow, more wind, more drifts etc. 

I have also decided to sell my mare and dealing with people coming to look at her and trying to make arrangements to ride which cannot be done here (much too icy thus dangerous), so it means hauling her to an arena for a test ride.  I think I have found the perfect home for her so cross your fingers with me please?

This is her with my Step Sons ex girlfriend riding her, they make a beautiful pair.

Inward Reflections

Goodness, I have been challenged the past couple days!  Starting with a major site issue where images where not loading properly to the masses of mud that we are dealing with from the warm temperatures and melting snow.  The horses are a mess with their daily mud baths :-)

There is a silver lining though and we can actually see grass!  I have not seen grass since October and while we are expecting some snow this weekend it has been nice to see a tinge of green (how it stays green in this weather is beyond me).

Today the horizon is filled with fog and a mysterious feeling that I must say I enjoy :-)

Ordinary to Extraordinary

We are often faced with challenging situations that dare to crumble the footing beneath our feet.  We must stand tall and hold on and know that the earth beneath our feet will carry us although at times it can be a bit rough.

I have had many joys the past week, a gorgeous owl that graced our tree, watching the horses play in the field now that the weather is warmer (it has been hovering around 40), the video tape that my youngest Daughter made for us for Valentines, the selection of poetry that my oldest Daughter wrote for each us as the sun rose this morning and she read with pride, reading in the languishing light of the evening, the joy of simply being and simply knowing:

Peace

It does not mean to be in a place

where there is no noise, trouble

or hard work.  It means to be in

the midst of all these things and still

Be calm in your heart

Thank you Cindy, always thinking of you these past 18 days

May your days ahead provide you with a bit of challenge and a lot of love - Happy Valentines day!

Major Cooking Streak

Coming from a father who taught at Le Cordon Bleu in Paris and producing a son that followed in his footsteps and trained at Le Cordon Bleu as well.  He has achieved Executive Chef status and has worked for several top restaurants in Minnesota my love for cooking runs deep.  He has been doing a lot of the cooking during the chaos and I have officially kicked him out of the kitchen.

I have found a renewed interest in the kitchen now that things have settled down so please bear with me as I share my love with you.

Tonights Menu will consist of:

Artichoke and Pancetta Frittata (with roasted artichoke hearts)

Warm Spinach Salad

French Baguettes

Here is the recipe for the Fritatta:

Ingredients

• 6 eggs
• 2 oz. pancetta (small), diced
• ½ can artichoke hearts, julienned
• 4 oz. Italian Fontina, grated
• 1 oz. Parmigiano-Reggiano
• Pinch of cracked black pepper

Preparation

Preheat your oven to 400ºF.
Render the pancetta over medium-low heat until crispy; remove and set aside, reserving the fat in the pan.
Beat the 6 eggs and season with a pinch of pepper; pour into the pan and stir the middle of the mixture with a spatula. When the eggs start to set, add the other ingredients, making sure to distribute them evenly throughout the eggs. Separate the eggs from the side of the pan with your spatula. When the outside of the eggs starts to solidify, place the whole pan in the oven.
Check on the frittata every 5 minutes. When the top of the frittata starts to become solid, sprinkle the Parmigiano-Reggiano on top. The frittata is done when the top is brown and the middle jiggles but is solid to the touch.

Here is the recipe for the Warm Spinach Salad:

Ingredients

• Salad:
• 4 cups spinach leaves (loosely packed)
• ½ medium-sized red onion, julienned
• 
  
• Vinaigrette:
• 4 slices thick bacon, diced
• 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
• 2 tablespoons Sherry vinegar
• 1 tablespoon course-grain Dijon mustard
• 
  
• Garnish: 1 hard-boiled egg, chopped fine

Preparation

Toss together spinach leaves and red onion. Set aside.
In a sauté pan, place bacon with olive oil. Stirring frequently, cook on medium heat until crisp. Remove pan from heat. Whisk in mustard and vinegar. Pour over spinach mixture.
Quickly toss salad and top with hard-boiled egg.

Bon Appetite!

Low Tides and Ebbs of Existence

The days have been restorative, I have sipped tea all day long and have rather enjoyed the 3:45 hour rather than dreading it to the point where it evoked tears. I have casually made dinner and dinners that were filled with love, thought and preparation rather than being hurried to get 5 children fed and the screaming/crying that went with the impatience.  Due to this we were often relegated to simple meals and thus meals that Bob and I would normally not eat.

Last night we made Fondue with seeded rye bread and tempura veggies.  The night before I made a healthy version of chicken pot pie and the night before that we enjoyed home made Pad Thai.  Tonight's menu will be sweet potato soup with veggie stir fry of roasted pineapple, pine nuts, pumpkin seeds, broccoli, snow peas, onions, bell pepper in a sauce of peanut butter, Vietnamese garlic chili, soy sauce and sesame oil.  Oh!  I also made some homemade granola for the girls and here is the recipe:

3 cups old-fashioned rolled oats or equivalent measurement with oat bran, barley and flax seed mixed in
1 cup raw almonds or pecans, roughly chopped
1 cup pumpkin seeds
1/2 cup coconut flakes
3/4 cup honey or maple syrup
3/4 to 1 cup olive oil or coconut oil
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoons cinnamon
1 cup chopped dried cranberries

1. Preheat oven to 325 degrees. In a large bowl, mix the oats, nuts, pumpkin seeds, coconut flakes, maple syrup or honey, oil, salt and cinnamon together. Spread mixture on a rimmed baking sheet in an even layer and bake for 45 minutes, stirring every 10 minutes, until golden brown and well toasted.

2. Transfer granola to a large bowl and add the dried fruit, tossing to combine.

Enjoy :-)  Namaste.....

Cold, Cold Cold.....

I am now officially tired of the cold, we have a temp reading right now of -19 degrees and a wind chill of -37 degrees.  Do you have any idea of exactly how cold that is?  If we were to put a sheet of Saran Wrap outside, it would shatter to the touch within 2 minutes.  If we were to throw a pan of hot water into the air, it would produce a cloud of ice crystals instantly.  If we were to be outside with any exposed skin it would be subject to frost bite within 3 minutes.  This is where doing horse chores gets hard :-(

This is just awful!  BUT, the sun in shining and standing in a window with the sun streaming in you can feel the nourishing heat.  I say this every year, I can't wait to move from here.

Year of the Rabbit

Since I am the Rabbit maybe this will be my year :-)

A person born during the years 1927, 1939, 1951, 1963, 1975, 1987 and 1999 is most fortunate to be born in the Year of the Rabbit. If you or someone you know is a Rabbit…heads up; it’s going to be an interesting year indeed.
Known for their diplomacy, the Rabbits are going to need all the understanding they possess this year. Many opportunities for communication gaffes are in the offing. However, think positive. Year of the Rabbit people should be able to straighten everything out and finish the year on an upbeat note.

In Chinese mythology, the Year of the Rabbit symbol represents longevity and it is believed that the Rabbit enjoys a close relationship with the moon. Westerners may refer to the man in the moon, but when the Chinese peer up at the moon, what they see is the Rabbit standing by a rock, holding a cup that overflows with the elixir of immortality. As symbols go, this is considered one of the finest.

Year of the Rabbit People

If you want to discover the true personality of the Rabbit, picture the character of Monica from the TV sitcom Friends. You will immediately be able to visualize the home of a Rabbit. It is always orderly, always clutter-free and if a knick-knack has been shifted one centimeter, the Rabbit will surely return it to its proper original position.

Because a Rabbit’s overall approach is calm and considerate, they make excellent teachers. Coupled with their organizational skills, they are well suited for supervisory positions. They are detail-oriented and happiest when engrossed in intellectual activities. However, since they are basically reserved creatures, they do not thrive in competitive environments.

 

People born during the Chinese Zodiac Year of the Rabbit are careful with money. More than any other sign in the Chinese Zodiac, they get the most enjoyment from their spending. They tend to spend money on furniture for their home, on new cars and most Rabbits love antiques. It is a joyful day when they discover a treasure from the past.

Imagine the fluffy, smooth fur of a rabbit, their fragility, alert personality and sweet disposition. This picture, more than any other, portrays people born during the Chinese Year of the Rabbit. Possibly it was a Rabbit native who first was described as being cool, calm and collected. They will avoid confrontation at all costs, even if it means allowing conflict to persist around them in the hopes that it will sort itself out.

Those born during the Chinese Year of the Rabbit have an eye for fashion and a talent for wearing clothes that perfectly complement every occasion. Because they are tuned in to all things color, they are interested in the arts, especially music and painting.

If given the choice, Rabbit natives will avoid adventure vacations, preferring more traditional destinations. They love different cultures; therefore their dream vacations would include Europe and Asia, although seeing the sights in the United States remains at the top of their list. They are the tourists who enjoy shopping in new locales, taking lots of travel photographs and tasting the local cuisine.

Lucky are those who count a Rabbit as their friend. The Rabbit is an excellent listener, will always provide a shoulder to cry on and has the ability to examine a problem calmly and with sensitivity. Oftentimes they come up with the perfect solution.

When a Rabbit finally decides to settle down, it is with the intention to partner for life. As in all other aspects of their lives, they desire a marriage that invokes few disagreements. Even little arguments can move them to tears. Consequently, a Rabbit is best suited to a spouse who knows how to pamper and show affection. This makes for a loving relationship; one that many people crave, but never realize.

As everyone knows, rabbits are identified with fertility. So it is no surprise that people born during a Year of the Rabbit tend to have large families. And since Rabbit people are essentially peace-loving individuals, they give in easily to the wants of their children, mostly in an effort to keep the peace. As mentioned earlier, they hate confrontation, so arguing with their kids is anathema to them.

However, because their own personality is mild mannered, they expect their children to act the same, and this often creates the very conflict that they wish to avoid. Once they understand each child should be able to develop their individual likes and dislikes, all becomes peaceful again. Throughout their lifetime, a Rabbit parent can be counted on to be there for her kids. Parenting never ends for them.

Do not make the error of thinking that due to their docility, a Rabbit will not pursue an objective. In actuality, it is methodical precision that allows them to achieve. And remember, they also have a bit of that “rabbit’s foot” working for them. Although their efforts will never be obvious, and they won’t make waves, beware—they can be quite formidable.

Year of the Rabbit Predictions
Because of your sensitive nature, you sometimes appear moody to people around you Rabbit. Try not to wear your feelings on your sleeve. Too bad the rest of the world hasn’t figured out that it costs nothing to be nice to each other. For that reason, you must not allow criticisms to get under your skin.

This is the year to expand your horizons. Put your creativity to work and think seriously about painting or learning to play a musical instrument. If you haven’t already tried your hand at either of these endeavors, this is the year to throw caution out the window and discover whether or not you have any hidden talents. You may be surprised.

As a rule, Rabbits are not fond of working out, but everyday stress can overtax you this year, and you have a tendency to overwork. Add some activity to your routine. Walking is probably your best bet. It is healthy, it stimulates the heart and a solitary exercise is best for you. It allows for quiet time to think. Explore the benefits of meditation.

If you run into any serious problems, they will likely revolve around your personal relationships. Whether you are single or married, this year will test the strength of your bond. Communicate, communicate, communicate! Misunderstandings are high up on your chart of life this year, so put extra effort forth. When in doubt about how best to react to a situation, do not be afraid to ask a friend for advice.

Year of the Rabbit Celebrity Birthdays:You share your year with some cool and oh-so-debonair individuals: Cary Grant, Jane Seymour, Sting, Drew Barrymore, Fergie and Angelina Jolie.

Essentially, this year will prove to be a surprising year for you. How you react to the changes, challenges, and little ups and downs, will have great bearing on exactly how your year ends. You must work toward your own happy ending. The winds of discontent are blowing, but there is no horrendous storm brewing. Be prepared and you will easily skim through this year. As an added bonus, people born during the Year of the Rabbit will learn new things about themselves this year.

Sponsored by:

 

Lost Plots of Midnight

I have not had a dream that I could remember in the last 6 months and last night I had a beautiful dream and not only did I remember it but I remember waking up and thinking to myself "go back to sleep so the story can start again".

The scene opened with myself, Bob and my two girls and there was a game going on in a large room with several other people (no idea who) where one had to voice how we could make the world a better place and then act out what we would do.  Bob stood up and he said that he would plant patchouli plants all over the world and we all promptly went outside and were greeted by thousands of acres of patchouli over rolling hills with animals grazing in the distance.  They all looked up and started to come towards our group and we gently stroked muzzles of felt, soft rabbit fur and held out our arms for singing birds to land on.

Harmony was up next and she said that she would paint the sky in rainbows and that we could see angels (she loves to draw angels in sandals, pic below of one of her drawings) and we went outside again and this time were greeted to the same meadow full of paint cans and we all picked up brushes and started to paint rainbows in the sky as if it were a canvas.  I remember smiling down at my Daughter and how proud I was of her.

Emilie was up next and she said that she would create a world where there was kindness and love everywhere and people would always say "bless you" when she sneezed (this is something that taught our girls from a young age, you always say 'bless you" when someone sneezes and it bothers her that her friends don't do it).  We then went to a room that was lined in gorgeous woods and flanked with ornately carved pillars and shelves and shelves of beautifully bound leather books.  We entered the room and began to thumb through the books and each page had a name and a quote under it that said "close your eyes and wish with your heart for the person named above to receive the contents of this book".  We did so and we instantly felt uplifted and grateful, I can't even describe the feeling, it was what wanted me to go back and continue the story.  As we left the room there was a golden coin on a table and she picked it up and promptly sneezed and we heard a thousand soft voices saying "bless you".

My turn was next but I awoke and I have no idea what wonders would have been held if I could have gone back to the dream but I am glad that I could remember this much and awake with a feeling of such peace and happiness.

May you dream beautiful dreams tonight and may the days bring you much peace and happiness.

Believe

I do believe and starting today my life returns....

I feel a sense of peace and yet I feel guilty for the decisions that had to be made but I know that they are the right decisions for the right reasons.

Our Weekend

Well, we took off Friday night and headed to our favorite sushi place at Mall of America and then to check into the hotel (The Hilton) and were greeted by a room that was terribly hot and then told that with the cold weather they had to shut down their coolers so it was around 80 degrees and very uncomfortable for sleeping.

We slept in for a bit Saturday morning and headed down for breakfast and then off to the Mall, the girls got their passes for Nickelodeon Park and we headed out to my favorite tea store Teavana and in passing we stopped at a jewelry shop to ask about a band for Bob's Rado watch.  His was a gift from his parents and while he loves it the rubber band was uncomfortable and too warm for all the work that does outside etc.  We were informed that there was no replacement so I swallowed hard and urged him to pick out a new watch and he got this.  The gift was for his 50th birthday and I really wanted him to have something that he was more comfortable with as far as the band.  I am so glad, he adores it.  Not that he didn't like the other one but the band made it hard to work and tended to pull on his arm hairs.  It was frustrating to hear that the band could not be replaced.  Anyway, he has what he truly loves and he tends to buy so few things for himself, this was truly something that made him smile.


We then met the girls at American Girl for lunch and had a wonderful time dining with their dolls.   Back to the park we went and waited while they enjoyed some more rides.  We were exhausted at this point and headed back to the hotel for some R&R before dinner.  We decided on Macaroni Grill and this is a place that holds special meaning for us as it was the first place that Bob and I shared dinner together, we always try to go to one when there is one in the town that we are visiting and this time it was a disappointment, the food was over an hour in getting to us and it was stone cold when it arrived :-(  They did give us the meal for free but we were saddened nonetheless and I suppose this is why so many have closed in recent years, it really is too bad.

After that, we came back and settled in (to a hot room) and then left Sunday morning due to an impending snow storm heading our way (we nixed IMAX).  I promptly decided I wasn't feeling good on the way home and by the time we got back I had the full body aches and landed in bed the rest of the day.  It just does not pay to go anywhere :-(

Full Breaths

As I have taken breaths the past 4 months they have shallow, filled with apprehension and stress.  My breaths the past few days have been filling and I can feel the hopeful days ahead.  Even as I meditate I am able to finally able to find center and let my brain go blank, it has been a canvas full of a myriad of colors, dark colors with little light, the light is now returning.

Friday, one more weekend and then it will be a cleaning like none other from top to bottom, washing away the splashes on walls, the food particles that are everywhere, stains from nail polish/juice/toothpaste on carpet, hand prints on windows and Heavens knows what else.  The house has been slowly destroyed over the past 4 months and it will be good to have my stuff back on tables, my precious belongings displayed where I like them, the girls rooms to be back in order and Emilie gets her play room back for her American Girl stuff and they need to no longer fear leaving something out.

I am really looking forward to this....

Have a wonderful weekend everyone and I start my countdown today, 4 more days.